


Picture Day

by SMDarling



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Banter, Deepthroating, Face-Fucking, Frottage, Humor, Kinktober, Kinktober 2017, Lingerie, M/M, Messy Orgasms, Natasha Is a Good Bro, One Big Happy Avengers Family, Tickling
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-13
Updated: 2017-10-13
Packaged: 2019-01-16 17:57:19
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,294
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12347694
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SMDarling/pseuds/SMDarling
Summary: The Avengers make a calendar for charity.Steve is less than thrilled with their chosen theme.Bucky thinks it might be fun.





	Picture Day

**Author's Note:**

> [Kinktober 2017](https://kinktober2017.tumblr.com/post/163962052261/kinktober-2017) Days 8 "deepthroating" but mostly 9 "lingerie" and "frottage". 
> 
> This one is Substantially More Light-Hearted than the [last story](https://archiveofourown.org/works/12332082) I wrote for Kinktober. I don't even think it needs any additional warnings! Except maybe for _sheer ridiculousness_. (But if you see something you think needs tagging, or mentioning in the end notes, please let me know in the comments or on [Tumblr](http://smdarling.tumblr.com/)!)

"Just be thankful we didn't go with the number one request!" Tony snaps. 

"It can't be worse than this!" 

"Avengers orgy!"

Steve opens his mouth to retort, then closes it. He visibly deflates. 

"But why couldn't we go with the third option?" he whines.

"Nothing else came close," Tony tells him, waving a Stark tablet in Steve's face too fast for Steve to actually read. 

" _Really_?"

"Yup! I promise Cap, sexy calendar or graphic porn. Those were far and away the most popular responses. We're a bunch of _really hot people_ , the public is willing to pay a lot of money to watch us fuck each other, and barring that they're at least willing to buy naked pictures of us. _Mostly naked_ , whatever."

"C'mon Stevie," Bucky chimes in before Steve can say anything else. He can tell Steve is working up to another talking point, and as entertaining as watching him and Stark bicker is, Bucky has other things to do today. Namely, Steve. 

"Don't you wanna see me in fancy lingerie?"

Steve spins around to stare at Bucky, who smirks at him from where he's leaning against the door frame.

"Cuz I know I wouldn't mind seeing you in tiny little lacy panties," Bucky continues, tapping metal fingers on his chin in a mockery of deep, contemplative thought.

Steve's entire face goes fire engine red. 

"It's for a good cause," Tony says from behind Steve, like an afterthought. 

Bucky nods at him, before leveling Steve with an intense stare. 

"He's right, baby. And honestly, as fun as this is, I have better things to do. Whatdaya say we get outta here, huh?"

Steve blinks three times in rapid succession, still blushing, then power walks to Bucky, who steps aside to let Steve exit the lab ahead of him. 

"Is 'better things to do' code for 'Steve'?" Tony asks as Bucky's eyes lock onto Steve's ass.

"Shut up Stark!" Steve calls, not looking back. He's almost at the elevators. 

"Yes, yes it is," Bucky growls, then shakes himself and looks over his shoulder. "Don't worry about him, I'll make sure there aren't any problems. You just get everything set up and we'll be there."

He exits the lab, letting the door close behind him. 

"When he says he'll make sure 'there aren't any problems', do you get the feeling that means there will be a lot of actual problems, or is that just me?" Clint asks. 

"Not problems for me," Natasha asserts, popping her gum and continuing to type nonstop on her phone. 

"Maybe we should've gone with the orgy," Tony hums, and Bruce groans. 

"I fully understand Pepper's need for a vacation from us," Bruce tells the ceiling, "but _damn_ , I miss her when she's gone." Tony claps him on the shoulder, smacking noise echoing around the room.

*******************

"This is the most humiliating moment of my entire life," Steve groans into his hands. 

Bucky raises an eyebrow at him, sipping his mimosa. "Sure about that, Stevie?"

"Bucky, shut up."

"Yeah Steve, don't you remember--"

"Shut up Sam."

"I can think of a few things I might consider more embarrassing," Natasha says, still focusing on her phone. Bucky eyes her suspiciously, but before he can ask what she's doing, Steve speaks again.

" _Shut up Natasha_!"

The entire room falls silent. Natasha stops typing and slowly lowers her phone. Steve raises his head from his hands to stare at her in horror. 

"Fine," she says slowly, making eye contact with Steve. "I guess the story of the first and only blind date I convinced you to go on will have to wait for another time." She looks back to her phone, and resumes typing at breakneck speed.

"Wait, what? No, not another time, what is this story?? Why haven't I heard it before?" Bucky demands, sitting up straight from where he's been lounging back in his personalized "director's chair". It's just as uncomfortable as he always figured it would be, but he's had worse and at least everyone else gets one too.

And the idea of a Steve-on-a-date failure story he doesn't know about is enough to distract him from the pain in his ass. 

But Natasha just shrugs, miming zipping her lips closed.

"Steve!" Bucky says, turning. 

Steve whines, head hidden again in his hands. "Just, shut up Buck, please everyone shut up, no one talk to me, no one look at me!"

"July! Who's July? Oh yes, Captain Rogers! Your turn!" the photographer yells at them. Bruce (June) is shrugging his robe back on as he leaves the studio stage. 

Steve's whine reaches a pitch only audible to dogs. 

"Why'm I July? _No_!" he snaps, not even having to look up to know everyone opens their mouths to speak at once, "Shut up, I know why, I just... _I don't like it_."

"Aw, poor baby," Sam says, reaching over from where he sits opposite Steve to pat Steve on the head condescendingly. 

"Yes, poor Captain America, darling of World War Two USO shows, punched Hitler in the face over 200 times, now has to suffer the indignity of taking off his pants for charity," Natasha says, voice completely lacking in any and all inflection. 

Steve somehow misses that, and snaps his head up to point at her. " _Exactly_! Thank you Natasha!"

She looks at him from over the top of her phone, face carefully blank. Bucky puts his head in his hands this time.

"Captain Rogers?" the photographer calls again, sounding less confident this time.

"It's not that bad," Bruce says as he finally reaches the group, Tony hot on his heels. 

"Yup, it's fun!" Tony says cheerfully. "Now hop to, Cap! Go shake your star-spangled tits for America!" 

" _Stark_ ," Bucky growls, still hiding his face.

"Tony!" Rhodey snaps, finally speaking up. "You're not helping!"

"I hate you. I really, _really_ hate you," Steve says slowly, glaring at Tony with his best Captain America Is Disappointed In You face. He mostly manages to avoid looking at the rest of Tony, who took off his robe to shoot January and never put it back on. It's a rather impressive feat, as Tony's red and gold corset/panty/thigh high stockings/garter belts combination is very hard not to look at. 

Steve stands up slowly. 

"We're on a schedule!" Tony says brightly, smiling. "Don't wanna be the reason this lasts longer than it has to, do you Cap?" He jabs a finger into Steve's chest, then frowns.

"How is it I'm wearing six inch heels and you're still taller than me?" Tony demands. He's the only one wearing heels, to absolutely no one's surprise. 

"Because you're a tiny, _tiny_ man," Steve hisses, and shoves past him. 

Bucky sighs and gets up to follow Steve. 

"Stay here," he commands the rest of the Avengers. "Steve is embarrassed enough without your help. _Especially you Tony_. I'm watching you."

"Who isn't?" Tony asks rhetorically, ignoring Bucky's patented Winter Soldier death glare with a skill born of many years of practice.

Bucky murder walks after Steve. The rest of the Avengers are silent, except for the clack of Natasha's fingers on her phone.

She taps one last thing, then slips the phone somewhere into her silk robe and stands. As one, the remaining Avengers turn to look at her. 

She raises an eyebrow at all of them.

"Well? I don't know about the rest of you, but I'm certainly not going to miss Captain America, how did you say it Tony? 'Shaking his star-spangled tits for America'?" She turns and walks after Bucky to the stage, where Steve is listening to the photographer explain his scene with a look of utter terror. 

Everyone else looks awkwardly at each other, before shrugging and standing up as one. 

*****************

"I am _not_ posing like the Statue of Liberty!" Steve tells the photographer, voice alarmingly high. 

Tony hums thoughtfully. "Hate to say it, but Cap's got a point."

Bucky whips around, sees the rest of the Avengers standing behind him, and literally bares his teeth in a snarl.

" _I thought I told all of you to stay over there_!"

"You should have Barnes do that," Tony tells the photographer, ignoring Bucky. 

"Uh," the photographer glances at Bucky who's vibrating with rage, then quickly back to Tony who _is_ taller than him in heels. "Why's that, Mr. Stark?"

"Because he's the one carrying the torch for America," Tony finishes, smiling proudly. 

"I will shove an _entire arc reactor_ up your ass, Stark!" 

"Thinking about my ass, Barnes?" Tony bats his eyelashes, and Bucky's metal arm calibrates in warning under his robe.

"He's not wrong," Natasha points out. Bucky turns to face her with a look of utter betrayal. She pops her gum at him.

"Why are you always chewing gum??" Bucky demands, for lack of anything better to say. 

"Because it annoys you," she says sweetly, then goes on to purposely chew as loud as possible. It echoes in the studio, and Bucky scrunches up his face in disgust.

"You know what? Fuck it, fine!" Steve says after almost a minute of everyone quietly listening to Natasha's deafening chews.

"I'll do it!" he shrugs off his robe and somehow violently drops it to the ground around his feet. Bucky and Sam both start choking on air for completely different reasons. 

"Give me the goddamn torch!" Steve growls at the photographer, who's staring in abject horror and shrinking back from him.

"Actually Sir, uh, Captain Amer- Captain Rogers, sir, it's a sparkler? Y'know, cuz fireworks?" the photographer stutters.

"Is introducing fire to this scenario really a good idea?" Bruce asks delicately. 

"Yeah," Tony agrees, leering at Steve's crotch. "Don't wanna risk burning the Great American Dic--ack!" He stumbles in his heels and falls backwards, into Rhodey's arms. "What was that for???"

Bucky calibrates his arm again, from where he reached blindly behind him to shove Tony. 

"You know what for," he says, not taking his eyes off Steve. 

"And soon, so will the world," Natasha intones dryly. She too is staring at Steve's crotch, where his penis is clearly outlined in red, white, and blue hiphuggers. 

"Damn, did the serum do that?" Bruce asks excitedly. Everyone turns to stare at him, no one expecting him to join in perving on Steve (despite the fact that he also came over to watch Steve's shoot).

" _Really_ , Doctor Banner?" Steve whines. 

"What?" Bruce says, looking around at everyone's faces. Natasha's is blank as always and both Rhodey and Sam (the latter of which is snickering incessantly) just have raised eyebrows. Bucky's mouth is gaping in shock and rage, Steve is giving him his patented kicked puppy eyes, and Tony looks like Christmas came early.

"Oh my God you guys, _no_ that's not what I meant!" Bruce tells them.

"What _did_ you mean, Doctor Banner?" Bucky growls, taking a menacing step forward. 

"Barnes!" Natasha snaps, but Bruce just puts his hands up in a gesture of surrender.

"Nothing, just scientific curiosity! I devoted the first half of my professional career to studying the serum, and there was never anything on how it affected things like sexual prowess or genital health! It was a huge gap in the information we had!" 

Bucky glares at him, but eventually accepts his explanation. 

Steve stares at the ceiling. 

"Give. Me. The goddamn. _Sparkler_ ," he says to the photographer, who rushes to light one from the stack he brought and hand it over, before directing Steve where he wants him. 

"Ooh," Clint says, finally joining them with a giant cup of Starbucks coffee in hand. "Whose idea were the star nipple pasties?"

"Mine," Tony says quickly, "did you go outside like that?" 

Clint aka February went searching for coffee immediately after his solo shoot finished almost an hour ago. Like Tony, he never put his robe back on. 

Clint looks down at himself, wearing a purple wannabe swimsuit like thing that just cups his junk then runs up his body in two thin straps, over his shoulders and down his back, before the two straps become one between his ass cheeks. 

He shrugs. "Yeah, so?" 

"How did you not get arrested?" Rhodey demands, still holding Tony up. 

"Where do you have your wallet?" Sam asks, expression twisting with confusion and horror. 

"I learned from the best," he says, gesturing to Natasha with his coffee cup. She takes a careful step back, knowing Clint all too well. 

Bucky glances away from where he's practically drooling as he watches Steve. He does a double take at Clint, then meets Natasha's eye and gives her an impressed nod before turning back to continue leering. He's the only one allowed to objectify Steve, after all, and this is a golden opportunity for objectification.

"And the cop who stopped me recognized me, she's a fan. When I explained what we're doing today, she agreed to let me go with a warning if I sent her a calendar for free."

"Did you write her address down??" Tony asks gleefully. He thinks this may be the best day of his entire life. 

Clint nods brightly, and goes for his back pocket. Which of course, he doesn't have, so he ends up just groping himself instead. His smile disappears.

"Aw pockets, no," he intones, patting himself down with one hand. 

His coffee comes dangerously close to Natasha again, who says his name in a clear warning. 

"I will strangle you with your stringy onesie if you spill that on me. I don't have another robe," she tells him. 

"It's not like you're going to be wearing the robe in your photo," Bucky mutters, still not facing the group.

"Actually Barnes," she says, "I'm completely naked under here." Everyone turns to stare at her, including Steve and the photographer.

" _What_??" Steve demands. 

"I've done my time posing for the male gaze in my underwear, Rogers," she tells him, popping her gum yet again. "This time, I'm keeping my robe on." 

"Why does she get to do that Tony! Why wasn't I given that option!" Steve yells, hand holding the sparkler coming down from its pose above his head. 

"She made the option for herself!" Tony yells back. "I wasn't gonna tell her no!"

"But you'll tell _me_ no?" Steve waves the sparkler, and sparks fall dangerously close to his dick. 

"Dammit Stevie, be careful!" Bucky marches over to him and grabs his wrist, holding it away from his body. 

"Look at the Winter Soldier, he's like a dog protecting his favorite bone," Tony coos, and Rhodey slaps him upside the head.

"Ow! What was that for?" 

"Behave," Rhodey tells him. "Before Barnes does something he'll regret forever."

"I won't regret it!" Bucky corrects, glaring. But he's still making sure Steve doesn't accidentally burn himself with the lit firework - why would anyone add fire to this situation, _who thought that was a good idea_???

"This is the worst day of my entire, hundred year long life," Steve tells the photographer matter of factly. 

"Correction: Best Day," Natasha says to no one in particular, popping her gum again. Clint nods sagely next to her, slurping from his coffee. Some drips down to land on his naked chest, and he flinches. 

"Aw coffee, no!" 

"Best. Day," Natasha repeats.

*****************

Somehow, Steve survives his solo shoot. 

He wants to immediately change into his real clothes, but the photographer reminds him they still have the partner photos and group cover to shoot. So Steve wraps himself back up in his robe and sulks in his personalized, tiny, unsteady chair. 

The chair would probably be fine if Steve wasn't 240 pounds of genetically engineered super soldier trying to curl up in a ball on it. As is, Bucky is ready to grab Steve and save him any second should the chair collapse. He's watching it closely as he stands next to Steve, petting his hair and murmuring soothing nonsense at him. 

By the time the photographer calls for December, Steve's 90% sure he'll actually survive the day. Maybe.

"Gonna come watch me, Stevie?" Bucky whispers. Steve nods, uncurling and standing. The chair gives a warning creak but holds. Bucky's impressed. 

They walk over to the stage, the rest of the Avengers once again trailing after them.

"Why are you all insisting on watching _us_ , huh?" Bucky demands. "You didn't all decide you absolutely had to see each other's shoots!"

"Steve's embarrassment was funny," Natasha explains, "and after me, you're the hottest Avenger. I didn't get naked--" Steve glares at her-- "so your shoot is going to be the most sexually gratifying to watch."

Steve splutters, but Bucky pats his shoulder soothingly. He shrugs apologetically. 

"Sorry Stevie, she's right."

"Hey!" Tony interjects, but everyone ignores him. 

"Um," the photographer starts, "Sergeant Barnes, for your photo I was thinking--"

"I'm going to take off my robe. I am going to stare into your fancy camera and walk towards you. You will take my picture. There will be no elaborate posing," Bucky tells him. The photographer nods meekly.

Bucky gives Steve's shoulder one last pat before walking to the center of the stage. 

"Your uh, your robe?" the photographer stutters. 

"Is your camera ready?" Bucky asks. The photographer quickly gets behind the camera, squeaking "ready!"

Bucky drops the robe. Even Natasha inhales audibly.

"Told you so," she whispers to no one as Bucky stalks forward. The photographer squeaks again before the click of the shutter starts going off like gunfire.

Steve's knees go wobbly and he grabs Sam's arm to hold himself upright. 

"Damn, your boy is _hot_ ," Sam says. Steve whimpers.

After Clint, Bucky is showing the most skin. He's wearing part of his Winter Soldier uniform, namely the gun harnesses for his chest and thighs, complete with actual guns. 

Other than that, he's wearing fishnet briefs, black and see through except for the red star centered over his cock.

"Did the serum do that too?" Bruce asks again before he can stop himself. 

"No," Steve says then slaps his hand over his mouth, blush returning in full force. For the first time in his life, Steve's grateful he blushes so easily - it means most of his blood is in his face instead of... Other places. 

Tony bursts out laughing. 

"Best day!" he crows, and fist bumps Clint. 

********************

"Since uh, since Sergeant Barnes is already um, here," the photographer stutters, "maybe we can do his and Captain Rogers partner photo next?" 

"What did you have in mind?" Bucky drawls.

"Well uh, maybe you could um. Disarm? Yourself? And if Captain Rogers would disrobe, again, and you could sit together on the couch?"

"Sounds good," Bucky says, already unstrapping. "Sound good to you Stevie?"

"What," Steve takes a deep breath. "What, _exactly_ , do you want us to do when we're on the couch?"

"Put your arms around each other?" 

Steve stares, and Bucky even stops unbuckling himself. 

"Y'know, around each other's shoulders! Like you're watching a movie! Just two guys being pals!" the photograph quickly corrects. Bucky squints at him for a few seconds then looks at Steve. 

"Sure, why not?" Steve sighs, and takes off his robe, handing it off to Sam. 

"Wow," Tony says, staring at the photographer. "Two guys being pals, _really_ kid?" The photographer shrugs helplessly.

"There's no way this is going to end well," Sam says. 

"I'm going to get some tea," Bruce says calmly, and starts walking to the door. 

"Want some company?" Sam drops Steve's robe before waiting for an answer.

"Me too," Rhodey decides, and rolls his eyes at Tony's look of betrayal.

"I'm not especially interested in watching my childhood hero getting it on, even for charity."

"But Rhodey!" Tony whines. "I thought _I_ was your childhood hero!" 

"I'm older than you," Rhodey reminds him, "and you know damn well I had a poster of Sergeant J.B. Barnes in my room until after I graduated college."

"Wait," Bucky interrupts, "I was your childhood hero? Why??? What about Steve?"

"Half the country loved Steve, the rest of us loved you. It was a pretty even split," Rhodey explains, still edging away from the stage and glancing at Sam and Bruce's quickly retreating figures. "I still have a Bucky Bear. And no offense man, but I'd really rather not watch you and Steve _being pals_."

Bucky is still digesting this information, so Rhodey makes a break for it. 

"Really?" Bucky says finally, looking at the rest of the Avengers. Natasha shrugs, saying "Americans, amirite?" with her eyes.

"Don't look at me, I'm lucky Dad even mentioned your name - it was all _Captain America this_ and _Rogers that_ ," Tony says. Bucky rolls his eyes. 

"Wasn't asking you, Stark."

"It's true," Clint confirms. "Even growing up in the circus, I had a picture of you from an old history textbook I would always--"

"Don't finish that sentence," Natasha says. 

"--look up to for inspiration when I was learning to shoot, what?" Clint asks, looking at her. She blinks innocently. 

"Sorry," she tells him, "I thought you were going to tell us about how you used to jack off on Barnes's face. My bad."

Bucky makes a noise of disgust.

"Well yeah, I did that too, but I wasn't gonna _say it_ ," Clint protests.

"I still hate all of you," Steve says. "C'mon Buck, let's get this show on the road."

"Please do," Natasha, Clint, and Tony say simultaneously. Steve groans, but Bucky winks. 

******************

"Just act natural!" the photographer says when Bucky and Steve sit on the couch on opposite ends, obviously tense and uncomfortable. "Like how you usually watch movies together!"

Bucky narrows his eyes. 

"Is this kid for real?" Clint stage whispers to no one. 

"What's your name?" Bucky asks. 

"Uh, my name is Peter sir. Not Peter Sir! Peter Park--"

"Peter," Bucky interrupts him, "how exactly do you think Steve and I usually watch movies?"

"They don't," Tony says helpfully. "Sure, they might have a movie playing, but they're definitely not watching it."

"Uhhhhhhhhhh."

Bucky rolls his eyes and swings his feet up into Steve's lap. Steve yelps. 

"How's this?"

"Great Mr. Sergeant sir! Soldier Barnes! Sorry, um--"

"Just take the damn pictures!" 

Peter starts clicking away. Bucky lounges, getting comfortable and shifting his feet continuously against Steve's crotch. 

"Um, sorry but um," Peter stutters, stopping again. Bucky raises an eyebrow. 

"Mr. Rogers Captain sir, could you um. Maybe try to relax?" 

"Do I not look relaxed to you?" Steve says through gritted teeth. He's trying to desperately to pretend Bucky isn't essentially giving him an impressively subtle footjob that he is definitely _not responding to at all while he's getting his goddamn picture taken_. 

He puts his hands on Bucky's feet, trying to hold them still. Bucky grinds a heel into his half hard dick and smirks at him. 

"Everything okay, Stevie?"

Steve glares at him, then slowly and deliberately tickles the bottom of Bucky's right foot. 

It's Bucky's turn to yelp, and he flails wildly, almost kicking Steve in the face as he sits up and yanks his feet away. 

"Oh it is _on_ now, Rogers," he growls, and lunges across the couch to dig his fingers into Steve's ribs where he knows for a fact the serum did nothing to make him less ticklish. 

"Bucky _oh my God_ stop!" Steve yells, writhing and trying to get away. But Bucky is relentless, and soon has him pinned. 

Steve's wrists are trapped in Bucky's metal hand, over his head against the arm of the couch, and Bucky's laying between his legs, still tickling him. Steve keeps twisting, trying to get away, but he can't get any leverage. 

"Best day ever," Natasha says. 

"Perfect!" Peter calls. "But could you guys maybe not move as much?"

Bucky and Steve both freeze, abruptly remembering exactly where they are. 

Bucky lets go of Steve's wrists and pulls back, going to kneel up. Steve tightens his legs around Bucky's waist, eyes wide. Bucky cocks his head in confusion, and Steve glances down pointedly. They're both hard, and if Bucky moves off him it will be _very_ obvious. 

Bucky winces, nods, and changes tack. He scoots back a little and folds his arms across Steve's chest, laying his head on top and facing the camera. 

"How's this?" he asks. 

"Great!" Peter says, "But uh, Captain Rogers, could you maybe um, drop your legs down? So I can see more of Sergeant Barnes?"

"Haven't you seen enough already?" Steve grumbles, but unwraps his legs from Bucky. He drops his outer leg to hang off the side of the couch, foot on the ground, and keeps his other one bent at the knee, tucking his foot between the back of the couch and Bucky. 

He lets his outer arm dangle as well, and cards his left hand in Bucky's hair, smiling softly at him as Bucky sighs, eyes fluttering closed. It's an automatic reaction whenever Steve plays with his hair, and Steve knows it. 

"I think I got it!" Peter yells excitedly, and both Steve and Bucky's eyes snap toward him. 

"Yup, this is it, it's perfect! You guys were great!" he gushes. 

"Does this mean we can leave now?" Bucky asks, pushing his head up. 

"Yeah--"

"We're done?" Steve demands. 

"Until the group photo, which will probably be a while--"

Natasha, amazing, _glorious_ Natasha, throws Steve's robe at them. Bucky snatches it out of the air with his metal hand and somehow uses it to get both himself and Steve off the couch without revealing their semis. 

Of course, Tony, Clint, and Natasha know what's going on but the innocent photographer has no idea. The three Avengers whistle and cat call as Bucky and Steve rush off the stage and out of the studio. 

*****************

The dressing room door dents the wall, and so does Steve when Bucky slams him against it. 

"Fuckin' hell Stevie, you in these panties, I can't take it anymore," Bucky growls into Steve's mouth, plastering himself against Steve.

Steve gasps and hitches a leg up around Bucky's waist. 

"What about you huh?" he asks, clawing down Bucky's back. "You're _obscene_!"

Bucky slots their hips together and _grinds_. 

"Fuck, Stevie _fuck_ ," he moans, looking between them. The wet head of Steve's cock is visible, panties not enough to contain it. 

" _I need you_ ," Bucky says and drops to his knees without warning. Steve almost falls, but Bucky's strong hands on his hips keep him upright. 

Bucky nuzzles his face against Steve's crotch, inhaling deep. 

"So fucking sexy," Bucky says, and fits his mouth around Steve's balls, still contained in silky lingerie. 

Steve keens, tossing his head back into the wall and leaving another dent. 

He gathers Bucky's hair in his hands and holds his face still as he thrusts. 

Bucky scratches at Steve's hips, yanking on the panties to pull them down and release Steve's cock. He leaves gets the band down to the base of Steve's cock, his balls still trapped, and presses hot, wet kisses along Steve's length. 

"Please Bucky, _God_ ," Steve groans, bowing his head to watch as Bucky wraps his sinfully red lips around the tip of Steve's cock.

Bucky circles the head with his tongue, licking up Steve's precome and groaning at the taste. He forces his tongue hard against Steve's slit, making his cock pulse and leak another drop.

Steve tugs harder at his hair and fucks his hips forward. Bucky obliges, opening his mouth wide and relaxing his throat. 

"Fuuuuuuuuuck." Steve's abs clench and he practically doubles over, holding Bucky down on the full length of his cock. 

Bucky gags a little around him and Steve loosens his grip, but Bucky digs his fingers into Steve's hips with bruising strength and pushes forward, burying his nose in Steve's pubic hair. 

He glares up at Steve with watering eyes and Steve takes the hint, straightening up again and reaffirming his hold on Bucky's hair. 

Bucky smiles around his cock and tilts his head back a couple more inches, giving Steve room. Steve takes it, pulling back first until only the head of his cock is in Bucky's hot, wet mouth, before thrusting in to the base.

He starts up a rhythm of fucking Bucky's face and Bucky relaxes into it. Every few thrusts, Steve pauses and just holds Bucky on his cock, feeling Bucky's throat contract. 

Bucky hollows his cheeks and sucks, massaging the underside of Steve's cock with his tongue as best he can. He reaches over with his metal hand to grab Steve's balls, still covered with the patriotic panties, now soaking with spit. 

Steve grunts and yanks Bucky off him, pulling him to his feet by his hair. Bucky gives Steve's balls a tight squeeze and tug before letting go and standing, flush against Steve. 

"C'mon Buck, don't let me have all the fun," Steve growls then kisses Bucky, fucking his tongue into Bucky's mouth viciously. 

Bucky braces his right hand on the damaged wall and forces his own panties down around his thighs with his left, freeing himself so their cocks rub together. They both groan, and Steve lets go of Bucky's hair to grope his ass, tugging him forward. 

"Fuck yeah Stevie," Bucky moans, and wraps their cocks in his metal fist. He pins Steve to the wall with the weight and strength of his serum enhanced body, and thrusts _hard_. 

"Yes _Bucky_ , do that again, _fuck_." 

Bucky ruts into Steve, their cocks sliding together in a mess of drool and precome. 

"Yeah, give it to me baby, give it up for me, mess up your pretty panties," Bucky growls, feeling Steve's cock swell against his. 

" _You_ ," Steve gasps, digging his nails hard into Bucky's ass as his balls draw up. 

" _Yeah_ Stevie," Bucky says, pressing their foreheads together so he can watch Steve go off. The added slick makes sliding his cock through his metal fist easier, and Bucky feels his release drawing close. 

Steve spins them, slamming Bucky into the wall and dropping to his knees. 

"Come on me Buck," he says, leaning back and putting himself on display, star pasties on his nipples, cock hanging out of red, white, and blue panties, and Bucky groans, long and loud, shooting over Steve's chest. 

"Christ Stevie," he pants, sinking slowly to the ground. Steve grins at him, licking a few stray drops of Bucky's semen from his lips. Fuck, he even got some in Steve's hair--

" _Damn_ ," he moans, giving his cock one more squeeze, "that was good." His ass hits the floor and Steve leans forward, nudging until Bucky wraps him up in his arms. 

"Yeah," Steve says, smiling up at Bucky. 

"Almost worth the whole photoshoot, huh doll?" Bucky asks, grinning in turn. 

As if on cue, Stark's voice interrupts their post-coital bliss.

"Hope you're done star spangling the good Captain!" he yells from outside the door, which is shut but obviously not entirely on its hinges anymore. "Group cover shoot in five minutes!"

Bucky and Steve stop smiling in unison. 

"Fuck," Bucky swears under his breath. 

"Tony!" Steve calls, scrambling to stand. "Wait!"

There's a pause. 

"Hearing the damage you two just caused was bad enough, Cap," Tony says. "I don't need to see it."

"Fuck!" Bucky swears louder.

"We - um, that is -" Steve stutters.

"There's extra in the closet, if the closet still exists!" Tony answers, and they can hear his heels clacking away down the hall. 

Steve looks down at himself, then at Bucky. 

" _Fuuuuuuck_." Bucky stands up and yells, "Stark! We need _ten_ minutes!" 

"Take your time!" Tony's voice yells back, slowly getting more distant. "Please! The photographer kid is only seventeen, we don't need a lawsuit!"

"Seventeen? _Seventeen_!" Steve says in despair, staring at Bucky. "We can't go out there like this!"

"No shit, Stevie," Bucky says, wrenching the closet door open. There's a stack of towels on some shelving to one side, and he grabs a couple, tossing one to Steve and starting to scrub himself down with the other. 

"We need - I need a shower," Steve whines, catching the towel and nevertheless starting to mop up the semen on his chest. 

"No time," Bucky growls, struggling to kick his panties off and stay upright. 

"You came in my hair!" 

"You asked me to!"

There's another knock on the door. 

"Captain Rogers?" the photographer calls, and Bucky and Steve freeze. "Sergeant Barnes? Mr. Stark said there was a wardrobe malfunction? Do you need my help?"

"No!" Steve squawks and Bucky gives him A Look. Steve rips his ruined pasties off. 

"Oh my God," Bucky groans, "no kid, we're fine! Just, can you tell us where our backup outfits are?"

"Backup outfits?" Peter asks. "Why d'you need backup outfits?"

Bucky and Steve stare at the door. 

"Um," Bucky starts, glancing at Steve who waves his hands in what Bucky assumes is a gesture supposed to mean "I don't know!" but just looks like Steve's swatting at a particularly persistent fly. 

"Y'know what kid? Peter? Never mind," Bucky finally says. 

"Are you sure? Here, I'll come in and help--" the doorknob starts to twist.

"No!" Bucky and Steve yelp. The doorknob stops moving.

"We'll be out in a few minutes, promise!" Bucky says and starts rifling through the lingerie in the closet. "Just get the others set up!"

"They're already set up?" Peter says hesitantly. "We're just waiting on you?"

"We'll be there, goddammit!" Bucky yells, and they can both hear Peter's squeak. 

"Yes sir, sorry sir!" And footsteps running away down the hall. 

"Why'd you have to scare him, huh?" Steve asks Bucky, pulling up the white bikini briefs Bucky throws at him. They have bright red polka dots.

Bucky just glares, which is made substantially less effective by the way he has to shimmy the lacy blue hiphuggers he chose for himself over his muscular thighs. 

"Sorry," Steve mumbles, and frowns at his junk. He can't manage to cover both testicles and his dick all at the same time. 

"Is there anything else in there?" he asks, looking up at Bucky with a pout. Bucky finishes adjusting himself, rolls his eyes, and shoves a hand down Steve's panties.

" _Buck_!" 

"Shut up Stevie," Bucky snaps, "and for the love of God, _do not_ get hard again!"

"Your hand is on my dick! It doesn't know any better!"

Bucky blinks at him. "Did you just imply your dick can think for itself? Do you have a sentient penis, Steve, is that what you're telling me?" He squeezes said penis. 

"You're not helping!" Steve hisses, yanking on Bucky's wrist. 

The panties rip as the door opens, revealing Natasha in her robe. Bucky crowds forward into Steve's space on reflex, shielding him from being exposed.

"Nothing I haven't seen before," Natasha mutters, rolling her eyes then wrinkling her nose as she takes in the state of the dressing room. "You do realize we're all supposed to change in here, right?"

"What d'you mean, _nothing you haven't seen before_?" Bucky demands, tensing. His hand is still wrapped around Steve's dick, so this results in Steve making a strangled noise and jerking his hips forward. 

"Shit! Sorry!" Bucky swears, letting go of Steve finally. 

"Here," Natasha says, pulling a pair of American flag patterned boxer briefs out of her robe. "I thought you might need these." She tosses them at Bucky and Steve.

"Uh, why?" Bucky asks. 

She just raises an eyebrow in reply. 

"Right," Bucky nods, "never mind."

"Now, you're going to come with me and leave Steve here to fix himself up. I am going to escort you to the bathroom where I will make sure you scrub your hands very thoroughly, and you will continue into the studio. Steve will then enter the bathroom, where I will also supervise his hand washing. We will join you and everyone else on stage, and follow Peter's instructions without question. Then we will be done, and you two can go back to your room that no one else has to use instead of defiling shared public space," Natasha tells them in a monotone.

"Why're you so invested in how well we wash our hands?" Bucky asks, narrowing his eyes. 

"You'll see," she says, popping her gum at him. He squints suspiciously at her, but decides obedience is the better part of valor and besides, whatever set up the photographer has for the group shoot can't be that bad. 

(He's wrong. It's a giant bed for all the Avengers to pile onto. It's not quite an orgy, but it might as well be. Steve wants to die, and this time Bucky agrees with him.)

******Epilogue******

The calendar earns almost twice as much as Tony projected, in large part due to Steve and Bucky. 

The mainstream media lauds their partner photo as a shining example of platonic male friendship, but keen eyes on the internet, namely Tumblr, are quick to point out how they're the only ones wearing something different on the cover. 

They hide prints of the other's individual pictures, find them, confront each other, then compromise by having their partner photo professionally framed and hung in their bedroom. 

"Stop starin', punk," Bucky grumbles sleepily, catching Steve gazing at the picture as the sun starts rising. "S'too early."

Steve smiles and rolls over, snuggling into Bucky's warmth. 

"Maybe Tony doesn't always have such bad ideas," he says into Bucky's chest. 

"Stop bringin' Stark up in bed Stevie," Bucky mumbles, burying his face into Steve's hair. Funnily enough, it has semen in it _again_. Weird how that works. 

"Sorry Buck," Steve whispers. "Love you."

"Love you too, now go back t'sleep or I'll tell Stark you said he had a good idea."

"Jerk," Steve says fondly. Bucky snuffles at him, already mostly asleep again. 

Steve sneaks another glance at the photo. _Yeah_ , he thinks, _that day wasn't so terrible after all_. He closes his eyes.

**Author's Note:**

> If you want, this fic can be reblogged [here](http://smdarling.tumblr.com/post/166351379675/picture-day-smdarling-marvel-cinematic)!


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